You're Addicted To What Now!?

There’s a show on TLC called My Strange Addiction. It features people who have all kinds of weird addictions and obsessive behaviors, a lot of them involving eating things. For example this girl, Kesha is addicted to eating toilet paper! Watch:


There are other equally disturbing episodes other than Kesha’s about eating shit too. There’s a girl who compulsively eats chalk and one who drinks detergent! Seeing this show and listening to these women talk about their suffering due to serious addictions to inedible and, in some cases, poisonous substances makes me feel SO much better about my dependence on wholesome chocolate chip cookies and buttery croissants! In all seriousness though, addiction is, well, serious.

The definition of addiction is as follows:
1. Compulsive physiological and psychological need for a habit-forming substance: a drug used in the treatment of heroin addiction.
2. An instance of this: a person with multiple chemical addictions
3. The condition of being habitually or compulsively occupied with or or involved in something.

The last one is me! It's me! Number 3 is me! I really do have an addiction to food! I am habitually or compulsively occupied with food! Traditionally people don't think about food as an addiction, they think about heroin or cigarettes or alcohol, but I truly believe that food is an addiction and IT’S THE WORST ADDICTION EVER!
Think about it. Heroin, for example, is a severe and fatal addiction and it’s excruciatingly difficult to kick that habit, but you don’t need heroin to live. (Trust me I’m not trying to discredit heroin, most of my idols suffered and died from heroin addictions.) But again, you don’t NEED it. You don’t need cigarettes or alcohol either. But you do need food. You need food to live. You have to eat food every single day to simply survive. So, if you’re addicted to food you can’t exactly kick the habit cold turkey. Food addiction can’t really be followed by a “recovery” period, but rather a change in your addictive behavior. Don’t eat this, eat that, stay away from that, try this and on and on. One top of controlling what you’re eating everyday, all the time, constantly for the rest of your life, as a food addict you should probably spend some time discovering the causes of your emotional eating the causes of your unhealthy cravings. Food addiction is a never ending battle.

I Googled “How to control food addiction” and I came to a link where some dude was ranting about how you CAN control your compulsion to food. His argument was to avoid all the bad foods you’re addicted to and only eat the healthy foods. So basically, Elio's pizza and jelly donuts out, broccoli and cedar plank salmon in. OK, if it were that simple then why are more than 60 percent of Americans 20 years and older overweight? Because it’s not that simple! Our addiction, the food, is being shoved in out fat faces every two freakin’ seconds! TV commercials, billboards, grocery stores aisles, checkout counters, all attractively flaunting our delicious addictions. Allow me to use the heroin example again. A heroin addict doesn’t walk down the street and have an uncontrollable craving to use come over them because they openly see people shooting up in the streets because people don’t shoot up in public, but they do eat ice cream cones in public. A heroin addict doesn’t have to walk down the grocery aisle every day desperately trying to resist the urge to purchase syringes and black tar heroin because they don’t sell that shit there, but they do openly sell Snickers and caramel Rice Cakes. See my point!?

I’m sorry heroin addicts, but I stand by my original point: food addiction is the worst! So have some sympathy for fat people, OK! We are competing everyday with a serious addiction! get off your high horse skinny bitches! I'm strugglin' here! Talking about addiction and dependence and all the things I just can't control is exhausting and it's making me work up and appetite.

On a lighter note, (no pun) I weighed in on Saturday and my current weight is 199. Oh boy...